Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
She even gives head with a lisp.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Randomize
