No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Randomize