I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
Randomize
