Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
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