Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
My boss' voice literally gives me gas
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
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