I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
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