the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
well I can't set my house on fire every night
I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
Randomize
