next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
Randomize
