i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
