I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
Randomize
