Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
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