hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
I am available for nakedness
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
Randomize
