i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Randomize
