you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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