how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
Randomize