he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Randomize
