yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
