I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
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