im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
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