if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize
