woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
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