he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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