he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
Randomize