Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
