PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
lol hangovers are for mortals.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
Randomize
