He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
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