I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
I will pee on everything he values.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
Randomize
