I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
