it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
turns out the guy i was dating because he was a cop was not actually a cop. i learned this as he got arrested by real cops.
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
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