I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Randomize
