i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
Randomize
