Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
Randomize
