She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
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