I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Randomize
