So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
She took me to ER. She says thought it was a squirtgun filled with vodka and she was 'marking me for later.' Thank god it's a flesh wound, and we're cool and going to date.
gtg, the cops are here
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
Randomize
