well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
Randomize
