Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
Randomize
