They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
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