yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Randomize
