That cute girl I hooked up with last night clawed my back to hell and gave me a hickey. I look like a white trash warewolf victim
my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
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