it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
Randomize
