maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
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