jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
I checked into jail on foursquare
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
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