Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
I just came up with the perfect plan. Once i'm a dentist i'm going to offer dad a million dollars to divorce mom.
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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