dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Randomize
