Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
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