if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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