Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize
