At least make sure they are 18
Why
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
So after we got done with our cardiac arrest patient, I thought how awesome would it be to hook up the defibrillator pads to cook a burrito.
dude... how have they not drug tested you yet?
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
Randomize
