Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
