She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
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