Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
